Contact Us Here:
Grown In Our Hearts
  • Blog
  • Our Family
  • Links
  • Contact

Feeling Grateful, Selling Paintings, and Other Thoughts

5/7/2015

0 Comments

 
Oh hello there! 

As it's been a while - I thought I would entertain you with all the things that have been in my mind recently.  Doesn't that sound like fun? :)

I am so grateful.  For so many things in my life.  My husband.  My health.  My grandmother.  My cats.  My awesome job.  But today I want to focus on something else that I don't think I've ever articulated in words. My support network.

I have been so lucky to be the recipient of so much support.  Ninety-nine percent of my family has welcomed our adoption plans with nothing but enthusiasm and excitement.  I have never felt the need to explain our desire to adopt or defend our decisions.  I cannot even begin to explain how much that means to Jonathan and me.  We are so lucky to have such an awesome family on both sides.

We have also been given support from some pretty awesome friends.  From Trisha allowing me to talk endlessly about this process to Stephanie and Eric generously accepting the post of Godparents to my Junebugs who created us a cookbook and a fund that comes from those sales (that's right!! I have a cookbook dedicated to our adoption journey!!) - the support has been overwhelming.  And wonderful.  Thank you.  From the bottom of our hearts.  I have lots of thank you cards going out in the mail soon - they are overdue, and I am so sorry.  Being busy is never a good excuse - but it's the only one I have.  

Next update: I am now an artist!  Ok, I guess technically I always was with my performing.  But now I've focused in what I can do to continue building funds for our adoption.  So I would like to introduce to you The PaintedPage !  It's not very populated right now - but I will continue to create these paintings and put up listings on the store.  If you find yourself in need of a kinda cool concept painting - head on over and get one!  I can do any quote from any book.  Here's one I did last night/today for my good friend Lia ... 

Picture
So that's kinda fun!  And really - any quote, any book.  Or song lyric.  Or whatever.  I enjoy making them - and then you can say "I have an original Kozik Quote Painting" ... but only if you say it in a snooty voice.  

Random Thought: Mommy shaming.  What? Seriously? How is this a thing?   I have just recently stumbled upon this "trend" and I was horrified.  I don't know ANYTHING about parenting (want a good story? Ask my dad about the time I discovered how expensive daycare is) - so how could I possibly judge another human being on how they are raising their tiny human being?  Then I realized the awful truth ... I was already doing it.  

I've looked at kids who were filthy and thought "You really need a bath".  Or a baby who wasn't wearing shoes and thought "that seems like a terrible idea".  I've side-eyed women who I thought breast fed for too long, or not long enough.  I've judged celebrity's baby's names.  I could go on.

But here's the thing.  I could be placed with a baby today.  TODAY.  (I mean, in all likelihood we have a while to go, but still) And I am going to know just as much about being a parent in that moment as I do now.  Which is almost nothing.  I'm going to make so many mistakes.  I'm going to call on so many people for advice and help.  And I am going to be judged.  Harshly.  And I'll cry over that.  And then I'm going to move on with my life - because whatever I am doing, I am doing because in that moment I think that's what's best for our baby.  And isn't that what it's all about?  

So please, let's not mommy shame.  It's shameful (ha! see what I did there?).

Parting Thought: Something that I have been noticing a lot recently is the tendency for people to be nervous about asking me questions.  Most people say something along the lines of "Is it okay if I ask ...".  Here is my universal response ... YES!! 

The majority of questions that are asked about my adoption are asked out of mere curiosity or the need for information in order to begin their own adoption process.  Regardless of the reason why the questions are asked, it is a topic which I highly enjoy discussing - and will do so until I am asked to stop.  So please ask away.  Even if you are part of that negligible percentage of people who ask with ill intent in their hearts - please ask.  I will do everything I can to hear your point of view and respect it.  But I do want to ask that you respect my decision and be kind. 

All My Love,
Nikisha
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    About Us

    we're Nikisha and Jonathan ...
    children of wonderful people
    owners of three cats
    readers and writers performers
    vegetarian and meat eater
    friends of the arts
    parents in waiting.



    Categories

    All
    About Us
    Agency
    Book Review
    Family
    Frustrations
    Fundraising
    Happy Thoughts
    Holidays
    House
    Jon
    Letters To Baby
    Questions
    Update

Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone, but still miraculously my own.
Never forget for a single minute,you didn't grow under my heart, but in it.
                                                                            ~Fleur Conkling Heyliger